Coldplay- Magic

Can't wait to play this song on repeat this weekend with my twin.
Absolutely love this song.

One of the most valuable things in a relationship is being able to constantly change and be individual, but look to the other side to the person that you're with and know that they're changing as well individually, but somehow you two can mirror each other and be the other half of that world that you both create.

-Justin Timberlake.

I love this man.

Alicia Keys: Try Sleeping with a Broken Heart

Throwback.

This song will always give me the goose bumps.

Last July, I put this picture up as my cover photo of my dream/goal.



Little did I know that...

I would try on the same outfits 3 months ago in Thailand!
I didn't notice it until today.
This outfit is only worn by a few of the Hmong's in Vietnam.
Yes, I was a bit too big for their outfits.

Finally got a confirmation that I'm graduating.
Just looking back at all my college years.
This song brings back so many memories.
AFS @ DTJ 2010.


My, has time flew and how so much has changed! Everybody grew up. <3

I Hear So Many Voices

I constantly hear so many voices.

Everybody always tells me, "I see you in the big city. You belong in NYC." "You're moving back? You're not going to last here because there's nothing here." "Girl, you do not belong there. Get out of there."
All my supporters keep imagining me with a bright future, and of course, they only want the best for me.
"You're going to be successful because you've gone through so much and overcame them."
They push me to not settle and get out there.









And although I am flattered, I don't know why... I really just want a nice, simple life and I don't see myself in that type of life. I just want to travel the world, yet always have a home near family. However, if I really have to go out of my ways to obtain something with greater heights, I will. Sometimes I really hear a voice inside of me that tells me there are bigger things out there I have yet to discover and do.
Decisions, decisions.

My problem: I never forget where I came from, but I need to realize that, that's not me anymore.

College Days.

Boy, oh, boy.

Once college is over, days feel like they pass even faster, yet slower. Everything seems so abstract. I must say- college eventually became just as good as high school, or even better. Like every other blog, I'd love to share my own tips or experience.


Never believe what others tell you. Their situation is theirs. Yours will be similar or different depending on how you handle it. I always thought I was going to be broke and eat ramen noodles. In college, I was eating AND cooking good. I ate organic. I ate out at nice restaurants. I still even traveled. If there is one thing I remember Jordan Zimmerman stating in my class, it was to not fall for what society tells you. If somebody tells you, you're not going to find a job, don't believe it. Push yourself harder to get it.

Yes, work hard, but most of all, work smart. I was a workaholic as a waitress in college, but I definitely knew how to spare my time to treat myself. I still went out to socialize. I analyzed my schedule to know how I could make money yet have time to study and play.

Choose a major you love and make sure it'll be useful in the end. I remember stressing in the beginning of college trying to figure out what I wanted to do and what I wanted to major in. I was a business student then tried to be the "old me" and wanted to pursue the pre-med path. Also, everybody else was doing it. I then realized that, that person wasn't ME anymore. I wasted my time doing something I wasn't passionate about. I changed my major and tested it out. I LOVE BEING AN ORGANIZATIONAL COMMUNICATIONS STUDENT. Everything made sense. I loved the energy from my peers to my professors and advisor. Just stick to a major and FINISH.

Challenge yourself. Ever since college, I did this "challenge a semester." It taught me to get out of my comfort zone and learn something new. It ranged from visiting different religious facilities, participating in the Hmong pageant, joining a dance team and competing with other schools, building a new relationship, joining a sorority, being an emcee, and studying abroad. After that, you start setting MORE goals like trying to new restaurants and bars, or traveling all over the world, and encouraging yourself to finish a 5k even though you hate running.

Make different friends. I don't know how much I always emphasize this. Make friends who share the same background so you'll have understanding people to vent to. Have artsy friends who take you to unique lounges and restaurants. Also, your mind will expand by appreciating art. Grab some ratchet friends who will make you laugh and always have your back. Gain smart friends who give you daily fun facts because eventually, you'll look just as smart *winks.* Rich friends to see the lavish life. Poor friends to appreciate simple things in life. Friends of all ages, ethnic, and places. You'll become more culturally reflexive.

If you want it that bad, just do it. You'll never know unless you try. Never doubt yourself because if you keep stalling, you'll wonder how it would've been... or wish you could've experienced it. For example, my sorority. Enough said.

Live with family to save money. Eventually live on your own to love independence.

Make friends your family. Make random places your home. Enjoy every minute of it and notice the little things. Go jog and take different routes around your campus! You'll enjoy life so much more.

Take the advantage of everything. Join clubs, whether it's a wakeboarding club or a marketing club. Get close to your professors and advisor because they're your references and mentors. They'll hook you up or will always help you to aspire what you want to be. Your main resources. Intensely listen to guest speakers or even try to shake their hand and thank them for coming. Be an ambassador at your school. Get to know a couple members of student council/government. Volunteer. Meet people outside of your major. Talk about the future, your dreams, etc.


Live to aspire. Aspire to inspire. Most of all, be you because nobody else will.


There are a couple of things I wish I could have done differently or sooner but up to this day, I will say that my last couple of years in college were one of the best growing experiences because I finally lived it how I imagined it. I woke up almost everyday loving my school, major, classes, job, friends, Tampa, apartment, etc. I don't know how many people get that opportunity to embrace everything, but I did... and I hope future college students will, too.

It's so beautiful out today but it's so sad.

A lot of people seem to criticize and misinterpret the Greek life. Today I just realized the beauty of being Greek. Even though people have their differences, by the end of the day, it's all about brotherhood and sisterhood. By the end of the day, everybody supports and respects one another outside of Greek terms. Many organizations from USF came together today to grieve over four innocent lives... Even spiritually from those at UCF and UF. Although, I may have not met or known the four brothers of SigRho, it's the fact of losing four young innocent lives that always hits the hardest.

And it's moments like this that always scares and traumatizes me. I thank God for being alive and surviving through certain situations, but I always feel bad for other innocent ones. Gosh. It's true. Call a friend or a family member, even a  cab or don't rush to go home yet  because you may cause harm to everyone else around you. Most of all, being reckless never makes matters better.

I just can't imagine if it happened to those close to me and give my sincerest condolences to the friends, family and brothers of Sigma Beta Rho, Mu Chapter.

Before everybody wanted to be ravers and go to every EDM show, there was the era when street racing was all that mattered. Hondas with turbos and speakers. Of course with the speakers, you had your blaring TRANCE/RAVE music. So youngsters, if you missed this era, rejoice yourself and bring out those glow sticks. Some of my favorites. Don't get me started! Once I find a few, I'll spend the next hour or so reliving my childhood days of AsianAvenue and digging for these songs we used to jam and rave to in our basements. Mind you, my cousins and sister-in-law always requested for my "cool" CD with all of my techno, rave, trance music. Although we tried to shun ourselves from the fob-like music, I knew electronic music was going to become the future one day. I have bewildering premonition and fortune-telling powers. MuahZ & xoxo's to my CD burners, ravers, racers, and break dancers.

#throwbackthursday #flashbackfriday #imsoasian #icantevenopenupmyeyes

Some Self-Love and Self-Worth Advice from Aryn Rand

"Tell me what a man finds sexually attractive and I will tell you his entire philosophy of life. Show me the woman he sleeps with and I will tell you his valuation of himself. [...] He will always be attracted to the woman who reflects the deepest vision of himself, the woman whose surrender permits him to experience -- or fake -- a sense of self-esteem. The man who is proudly certain of his own value, will want the highest type of woman he can find, the woman he admires, the strongest, the hardest to conquer -- because only the possession of a heroine will give him the sense of achievement, [...].

He does not seek to gain his value, he seeks to express it. "


I had to delete some extreme things she wrote  lol.

"To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all."

-Oscar Wilde

And honestly, I just want to live.
To die knowing that I did live, how I want it to be.
Die a story, a worthy story to be told.
Let's get serious, but also, let the adventures continue, God and 2014. 

Along with G-Eazy, I found Skizzy Mars. I love their song "Pay for Me."
And thisss. 

Yesterday my niece and I made Russian Tea Cakes (with a hint of Hershey's Kisses), and had a mini tea party.
Such a creative girl- she made us name tags and played "smooth music" on youtube for us.
<3

My favorite breeds: pit bulls. 
One of my friends used to tell me, "You are not a shih tzu! You're a tamed pit bull!"
Maybe that's why I tend to favor them more, or perhaps, people always talk down on them!
They're the cutest and most lovable dogs. I always beg their owners to let them out the cage and play with them. LOVE THEM!

Ladies night-in last Friday, and we cooked!
What's on the menu?
Sushi bake, chicken parmesan pizza, and veggie pizza.
Of course, you cannot forget about our salad bar.
Bon appetite!

"You only live once, but if 

you do it right, once is 

enough."

-Mae West

Hippie Sabotage "Stay High"

Ever since my summer trip to Cali, I've been obsessed with chill dubstep/trap music.
Anything chill, I love.
Shout out to NorCal/Stanford! 

G-Eazy ft Dominique Le Jeune "Marilyn"

My new favorite underground rapper.
I don't know how I didn't discover him until later on.
He's going to be on tour!

Dreams are Dreams

I'm one of those crazy people who always ponders on their dreams for the next day or two. I haven't had many vivid dreams in a long time. This morning I had the most terrifying dream ever. It was one of those dreams that you remember how horrible you felt... And the  scene  itself. I don't think I've had such an intense dream with manipulation, human threatening experiment, gun shootings and rescuing children before.

It scares me. I just hope my families in SEA are safe and secure.

I googled my dream:
 "Rescue

To dream that you are being rescued or rescue others represents an aspect of yourself that has been neglected or ignored. You are trying to find a way to express this neglected part of yourself. Alternatively, it symbolizes an subconscious cry for help. Perhaps you are too proud in your waking life to ask for assistance.

In particular, to dream that you rescue someone from drowning indicates that you have successfully acknowledged certain emotions and characteristics that is symbolized by the drowning victim."

K Roosevelt: Do Me Now

Music makes me sane.
Feels so good to always discover something new,
Like old times. Mmm.

Janelle Monae ft. Miguel "Primetime"

Baby, it's a primetime for our love.

What a great way to start my morning. 

Thanks to my friend who still thought of me while she's in Germany. My old love for Bob Marley. One of my most favorite and heart-warming songs ever. 

Most of all, I just love dancers.  

I can't get over this choreo. 

TOKiMONSTA: Little Pleasures

It's been awhile since I've posted some music, huh?

Ah, I miss this.

Photo credit: Vitamin W

Check out more photos at http://thereconstructionists.org/

I don't want people to remember me for the way I looked, or the way I dressed.



I want them to remember me for me.
My obstacles. My future success. My experiences. My life.
My laughter. My expressions. My advices. My voice.
My opinions. My writing. My tastes. My thoughts.
My insecurities. My memories. My feelings. My soul.


<3

Thailand Reflection

I didn't do a good job at updating my adventures in Thailand, but I think no matter what I post, pictures, videos, and stories will never do justice. It only shows clips or a certain perspective of my 5 month trip that felt like a one-year trip.

2013 was my year of travels, but I got tired of traveling. I got tired of doing touristy things and just enjoying the moment for a quick second. Not only that, it was my year of challenge- to try something new and different all the time. It was like a food-tasting lifestyle that year. With that being said, I wanted something more. Something much more challenging and life-changing rather than leisurely fun.

I'll make my recap short and simple as possible with the lessons I've learned from Thailand and about myself.

1.) I've briefly read this book my niece made me read while I visited her in Minnesota. If there is one quote that always stuck to me, it's "You have to go in right." It's true. If you learn to take away your "comfort" and just accept what that society is, you'll adapt much more. Not only that, you learn a lot more. Some people think that they understand what they hear, but they don't. They're not listening, they're still interpreting in terms they understand from BACK at home. Leave what you know behind, and enter into something you DON'T KNOW.

2.) Quit comparing and complaining, or you'll never enjoy the ride. All the frustrations is the joy of it all.

3.) Be humble, but don't be stupid. There is a time when you can respect your surroundings, but there is a time when you HAVE to be aggressive.

4.) Be willing. Be willing to try new food, new things, see new places, meet new faces.

5.) Slow down. If you're always in a rush, you'll never notice the beauty around you. Even if you do notice it, you'll never learn how to appreciate it. Meditate while you walk. Examine EVERYTHING around you and try to remember it all because sooner or later, you'll be leaving it behind.

6.) All the things you DO want to see end up being overrated, but all the things you didn't care for or didn't know will be your most memorable ones.

7.) Just because you visited somewhere for a weekend or a week, that doesn't make you an expert of the place. It took me a couple of weeks to call Thailand my home and to truly love it. Even after five months, I feel like I haven't explored everything yet. I still had so much more to embrace. I have my own opinions on Thailand, but I don't expect people to follow those opinions. I'd rather have them see it for themselves. Scratch that. No, I'd rather have people EXPERIENCE it for themselves.

8.) I love underrated places and things. Most of all, I love seeing the beauty behind the damages/slums/ghettos because people rarely give it credit. I'll go where people refuse to go, and I'll snicker at the places everybody wants to go. Commercialization is overrated, and yes, I must be a freakin' hypebeast.

9.) If you know me, I'm a quiet person, but I can be very social when I want to be. It can also be the other way around-- I am a social person, but I can be a quiet person when I want to be. I've learned something new about me: even though I'm not as loud, cool, or talkative as others, I make friends easily-- and I have great, trusting relationships with these friends who turn out to be my family.

10.) Everything is cross cultural. Everything is socially constructed. I think it made me MORE annoyed of people and society, even myself. We complain about service, food, the way we and others look, etc. BUT we fail to realize how many people out there are struggling, starving, and are in physical pain. We fail to realize how people can't help with what and how they're born with-- criticizing ain't gonna help either.

Familiar faces: Let's spare time for all

I wish those surrounded by family knew how it felt like to be without family. Most of time, maybe it's us who choose to live far away from family so it is our sacrifice, however, that doesn't mean we should be the only ones making an extra effort all the time. 

This weekend we will be visiting my niece, Michelle, in Nebraska. I'm really excited. I have always told myself I need to go visit her before she graduates because I know how crazy girls are. They love to pull out that passive aggressive card. "It's okay. I understand that people are busy and have no money." While they're saying that, they're probably thinking, "But you have time and money to go to other places though!" Not that she's crazy, but I know how it feels like... to hear family members tell you they're visiting you. 

It took us five years to visit her. 

And honestly. That's sad. 

We get so caught up and find alternatives or excuses. 

If I could choose one thing I was bitter about, it would be that I didn't get enough visits. 

Especially during the time when I needed people the most. 

Or when I asked people to and they never did. 

Most of all, those who complained about me not coming around enough, yet they never visited me.

And if they did, they didn't visit me, they went to Orlando, and I took the extra 2 hours to visit them.

The ones who did visit me were my best friends.

However, my most favorite visitors were my cousins and nieces. 

It wasn't the fact that they came, but the fact that they put in some time, consideration, and effort to see me-- to see MY WORLD. 

I love hosting people and showing people around. 

I don't think I would have learned to appreciate visits or understand the value of visiting others if I never lived in Florida. I try my best to visit those who I love, and make up for not attending to their events. Sometimes I still suck at it, but I really do try because everybody loves seeing faces. Familiar faces.